Trying To Live Up To My Faith (daily)

I think we go through this, every day. What do I mean, and what is its value to others?

I go to Church, pray diligently (and try to do so meaningfully on a daily basis), think I have a pretty good grip on the Lord's expectations of me, believe I am reflecting Christ on earth ... and realizing I have so far to go....

Don't we all think this way, if even fleetingly? If we do, I think this is a good thing. Humility, at the foot of the Cross, brings us closer. Our desire to reflect Christ pleases Him. Even if we don't, our efforts to please Him are very important (Thomas Merton said this, so I can't take credit. But I was deeply moved by the words, paraphrasing, mind you, that the "efforts to please Him do, in fact, please Him").

I need to keep this in mind daily. I am a writer, but I'll get into that another time as the blog develops. The most important thing, to me, is to get others to talk with me about similar experiences and to share wisdom about increasing our Faith.

Here's an example in my own life: my latest book is doing OK (still in its infancy), my regular vocation is hanging by a thread (I am not a famous writer, so my royalty checks can't quite pay the rent). My beautiful wife has taken the religious education of our kids under her wings (which are broad and infinite) for 15 years.

Now it is my turn to treat them like adults, talk to them about Faith like adults, and they are fighting me. Indifferent, actually, like teens can be. Nothing makes teens look at a dad as a religious fanatic like demanding (which I do) that they make Jesus the center and pinnacle of their existences. Pray daily, say the Rosary, go to Church. You get the idea (PS even if you are not Catholic, the Rosary contains prayers all directly from Scripture and how can that hurt anyone? The effort to pray can count as prayer too). I have extended family that can cause me inner anguish. So what's my point?

I am not a happy person. However, I have prayed hard on all these issues. Not for material success, but for spiritual enhancement, for me and mine. I prayed for my Faith to be stronger. Because if one's Faith is strong, that all things can be given to God to allow His child to flourish in trying times, then we are fulfilling, partially, our obligations to Him. The other is not just to give Him one's issues, but to love Him above all else. Frankly, I have a tendency not to want to bother Him because I love Him. I am getting past this, thankfully.

This spiritual exercise of prayer (this virtue of religion, which we perform for Him) has slowly helped me. I mean I prayed hard, friends. I did ask that He take care of others, before taking care of me (like He couldn't do both at once or times 10 million...). I had a chance to reflect Christ or be an angry person recently. He came to me, I reflected Him (this, that I prayed hard about) and it changed my circumstance, in this case, as if it never happened. How is that for the power of Christ? I was wavering, asking for help, and it came like a tidal wave. It lightened my heart considerably.

But I wavered, first, emotionally. Even, perhaps, psychologically, at this part really bothered me. I should have known He would take care of me, as He chooses and when He chooses. I needed to be patient ... and Faithful.

This is the gift I want to give Him: my unwavering Faith in His love, for this tiny creature. And to reflect Him, an irascible guy like I am. This is the daily thought. I think we all struggle with it. Don't we?

I have lots more to say, as I explore my Faith. I hope you take the time to read my blog and give me your thoughts and testimony. God bless you.

KJ Price